Crimanti Relational

Well its official the season of the Sopranos is finally over. Unfortunately there is some doubt whether this cult crime drama will continue ever again. I must admit my love of watching this mafia-family soap. There has never been a collection of antisocial or sociopathic characters in just one tv show. (except for the prison show called OZ perhaps)

If you are familiar with the antisocial personality type you will know that the descriptions of Con Man, charming manipulator and rule breaker are but a few statements one can make about this type of person. The anti social type seems to have more regard for himself than he does for others. The anti social personality type will attempt to sell you something or con you and if all else fails rob you of something.

The Soprano's are not just anti social characters, however Tony and the gang have quite sociopathic tendencies. The boys seem to incorporate killing as a normal routine task and when together as a group they seem to turn on each other like a pack of dogs. These soprano characters all have personal relationships and interesting backgrounds but they also form the nucleus of an organised crime gang where death and violence are comonplace.

Tony Soprano is a formiddable mafia boss, a man to fear and a man to love, a father and human being. Perhaps that is what the studio directors are selling us and the character that James Gandolfini portrays.

Tony Soprano aka James Gandolfini

The characters in the series form various relationships with family members, crime figures and even FBI agents with purely one aim. To get something out of each other. The anti social type is motivated to set up relationships for self gain at the expense of the other. They seem to show a willingness to sacrifice relationships for something more important. It's obvious to me that superficial relationships would be the best kind to have in the Soprano's industry.

So what are the Producers and directors of this tv show trying to sell us? The characters in the drama are dangerous criminals and also portrayed as having loving human qualities. Perhaps the "selling" here is about pseudo human relationships?

The atisocial person is out to gain for themselves. Their life position might be "Im OK your highly irelevent" I+ U (?--). (Ref Tony White)

The same types of relationship postions are explored in the show's therapy visits by Tony Soprano. The relationship betwen his therapist involves adversarial transference. Tony seems to be angry and while attempting more vulnerable feelings to connect with his therapist. They always seem to come back to the adversarial level. What does Tony want from therapy one might ask? Over time Tony Soprano "sells" the therapist the psuedo relationship and they do seem to enter into relational subjective spaces.

But it appears that working with anti social and anti relationship types with talk therapy has the potential to increase his pathology. Lorraine Bracco plays the confident psychodynamic therapist who terminates Tony's treatment when she realises Tony has been "selling her" all along. She reads some theory and takes advice from a colleague about the antisocial client using therapy to hone their pathological skills. I interpreted the therapists countertransference to involve hate and anger. Had Tony Soprano achieved his anti relationship payoff by getting his therapist to finaly feel hate?

Hate is strong like the feeling of Love

In the last show she has had enough of Tony ripping pages out of her waiting room magazines before his appointment. Perhaps the aim of the anti relationship person is prove that relationships always seem to end. The type of attachments and family relationships in the Soprano's environments is echoed in Tony's therapy sessions.

Anti Inter-Relational Work

Adversarial Transference

So the anti social personality in my view of the Soprano's, is that they really wish to have deeper connections and relationships with others, however there is a way they stop themselves before achieving that relationship. The person shows their genuineness in order to have heart felt understanding relations in life. After some time it is highly likely that the genuine qualities become the hook to the anti social person. They seem to gain power as they continue the charming and manipulative process. I guess for them its like seeing a bargain and then going for the benefit involved. The power is in the con and the negative outcome (sacrifice) is the anti relationship. For the Anti Social person, life is unfair, "you cannot trust anyone" therefore "its ok to take advantage of others" to get what you need.

Tony selling the therapist

Anti Relationship work is about stepping into the con and being involved in the Anti Relational game while having a clear idea about ones own boundaries. The end of the relationship is always looming and the person will sadly or happily, probably get what they want from you.

kenoath